The [Sarcastically] Best Post EVER

When it comes to language both written and verbal, I appreciate humorous quips as much as the next girl. It took me awhile, but I started using "fail" in a sentence, though I think saying something is "epic" is still a little too "emo" for me. I guess I have a harder time harnessing my inner 17-year-old boy than others do. I jest. However, there is one colloquial saying that I just can no longer silently tolerate. It has become a huge pet peeve for me.

My [husband, daughter, mom, etc.] is the [insert superlative adjective here, e.g. best, prettiest, smartest] EVER.

I know I'm going to sound hypersensitive, but I find this SO OFFENSIVE. Seriously. When using a superlative, you are by definition making a comparison. For non-grammarian readers, a superlative is basically a descriptive word with an -est at the end of the word. It's usually fine when using it to describe inanimate objects or ideas, but it's pretty much never fine when used about people in public.* For example, when someone tells me they have the best husband ever, I know they don't intend to say that my husband is worse by comparison, but that is exactly what they are saying. My mental reaction is usually, Hmm, I think mine's pretty swell, thank you very much.

Granted, I used to use this phrase all the time to describe people, that is until I bore the brunt of this comparison enough times that it became very hurtful to me. People don't intend it, but after awhile, especially to people whose Love Language is Words of Affirmation, it's very difficult to indirectly be told you, someone you love, or something you've done is second best. As a Christian, I think I can without question say that edifying one person while demeaning another is not really what God intends. I mean it's pretty explicit in Ephesians 4:29, no matter which version you read. The New Living Translation is not usually my go-to version, but I'm a fan of it with this verse: "Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them."

I am in no way an expert on this. I am also in no way inferring that we should walk on eggshells around people, always worrying that we might offend others. That's just plain nonsense. But think about it, would you walk into a room full of teachers and loudly proclaim to one of them, You're the best teacher EVER!!!? No, you wouldn't. Or if you did, you'd probably get a lot of scowls. Nobody wants to be second best. Now if I told you that Dr. Pepper is the best carbonated beverage EVER, I'd be right. It absolutely is. :o) And if you told me that The Office is the funniest show EVER, I'd probably tell you that you were crazy. I don't think I'll ever understand the draw of that show. But no one would be hurt. I think the Queen of Long-Winded made her point.

I just had to get that out. A huge percentage of people I know use this phrase. I think even my husband recently used it to describe me on Facebook the other day. So I want to clarify that I am not directing this at anyone in particular and don't want anyone to feel judged by me. I just think that we too easily say things we think without considering their effect on others, and I felt the need to present people with a viewpoint on a topic about which they probably haven't given much thought. People are obviously free to formulate their own opinions.

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*I totally tell my husband that he is the best ever in private but never within earshot of other people. When other people are around, I love to publicly encourage him but try to do so without superlatives.